To be...or not to be?

Pardon the lame title. Its just, i've been feeling more and more drawn towards Christianity, and yesterday, the topic of going to church and being Christian just popped up during tuition. So, my teacher was a Christian, and we just started talking about how i might have the 'holy spirit' within me, if not i wouldn't have

been wanting to be a Christian. Technically, i am not sure what religion i was born with, but mum was a Buddhist, so technically i am buddhist (my dad can't really be bothered with the whole religious thing). But, i didnt want to be one, i just, didnt feel like a Buddhist. I didn't know there was another religion like being a Catholic or Christian, so till i was in primary school, i started to be concious about other religions, then that's when i knew i actually want to be a Christian. As i grew up, obviously i had to succumb to my surroundings and i feel more like i needed the freedom of choosing my own religion. But, my mum was like, "If u want to become a Christian, u are no daughter of mine." Yeah, it was that serious. Ridiculous, that's how i felt. I mean, we are all born to have a free will. I know parents are our elderly and we're suppose to respect them and not go agaisnt them, but really? I can't even choose what i want to believe in? URGH, RIDICULOUS. My aunts and uncle slowly converted to Christianity as well, and i keep hoping that one day, i'll be able to go to church openly and not lie behind my parents' back about my whereabouts. 

So, my tutor told me that i should not feel afraid to go to church (i always use 'not enough time' as an excuse for not going church), but really, the whole problem lies with my parents. They are just so strongly against me being a Christian. -_- But, i think i will be a Christian when im 21, when i am an adult and i can make my own decisions (FINALLY). I just enjoy going to church, even though i only visited there twice. Maybe it really is the 'holy spirit'. Being like a staunch Christian, my tutor was worried that i might stray away from the religion, but i was sure that i am going to remain a Christian. Problem is, a Christian isn't suppose to burn incense or offerings. But thats what a typical Buddhist or Taoist do. So i can't imagine that if i become a Christian, and i can't offer any thing to my relatives who've passed away, what will my parents think?! Like, i'm not a filial daughter or that i'm being rude or somthing?!! 

Still, i pray for myself and hope that i can get out of this...situation. It really is a question of to be or not to be .__. 

2014 IS COMING???!!!

WHAT i cannot even, really. 2013 flies past wayyyyyyyyyyy to quickly, and i really wish i can have some time machine and go back. Really, there are so many mistakes that i've made this year and i really want to amend them, or at least change what i had said before, then maybe i wont be thinking so much right now. UGHHHH. Yup regrets, well, we all have them right? But it really sucks bad lah, there was so many things i wish didn't happen.. 

There were happy memories of course. To name a few, the list probably goes like this: 1) My new secondary three classmates who are really cute. 2) Having to be in the best class 306 2013 ever. 3) Forming a new clique with my new found friends. 4) Struggling and cramming last minute homework with my classmates. 5) Frequent and weekly lunch outings with my new classmates to Siglap after school, gossiping non stop. 6) Hanging out with my favourite bunch of netballers. 7) Accepting and liking our team's new coach, Adda. 8) Learning that i did exceptionally okay for mid-year and end-year exams despite a last minute revision. 9) Spending time with my sandwich meridian gang during recess. 10) Attending performances like 相声 with 206 2012 and hanging out till 11pm afterwards. 11) Sam Tsui concert 2013 with Laura and Sam. 12) Going for Melissa's chinese orchestra concert with Xin Xian and Sam. 13) Going for holiday in December to Taiwan. 14) Senior's farewell party and bbq/pool party with the netballers. 15) Last but not least, managing not to gain like 5kg in the holidays, so its an accomplishment. 

Really, although these things seem very retarded to be considered great memories, i still treasure them alot. I think naming them out right now, i feel like tearing (LOL), cause i realise that i am actually lucky to have found such good friends in Temasek Sec, and i honestly don't want to graduate so quickly. Yeah, there might be people who hate me or talk behind my back (confirm plus chop) but i'm glad at least i found friendships that might actually last through my life. I really miss some of my primary school friends as well, especiailly Jamie :( we only met up like once this year.... (;_;) she's like my ultimate best friend :') UGHHHH SO MUCH FEELS!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2013 past super fast can, i still can't accept it. Its really different compared to the honeymoon sec one and two period. I don't think i'll make a new year's resolution, but i do hope everyone (like, everyone) stays safe and healthy ^.^ 

I think i'm so sentimental??!! I have never posted such a serious/formal and word-fancy post before, so here's a first. Hope i wake up soon and study harder since its the o'levels next year T_T WAKE UP KHYTHENG!!!! But i honestly doubt i can master self discipline so quickly. It takes tooooooooooooooooo much willpower. Like, i write a sentence of my homework for five seconds, and next im on my phone using tumblr, instagram, twitter... DISTRACTIONS  yes, they have to be eliminated. Soooo, cheers (jiayou, actually) to me! 

HAPPY HOLIDAYS (FOR LIKE ONE MORE WEEK)!!!! ^o^

Random Picture Post

Chinese ochestra concert;

 

All Staff Day celebration;

Just a few snippets from my life from 4th-5th septemer 2013, since i havent posted anything for so long :/ in love with all my friends in TMS whoohoo :* 

相声 Night 2013

Today is the day where i really feel like blogging :p this post is about te chinese cultural show we went to watch, which is 相声, and the theme was <<哄堂>>! I was excited for it not really because it of the show, but because of being able to see and hang out with my friends <3 

Idk why i wore jeand that day :/ 

I love 206 2012 :-* 

HAHAHAHAHAH UGLY ME 

Best fwenz 

We went for supper and lepak-ed for about 1hour after the show :-) this is really the best class ever :3 

Adventure Cove 2013 :-)

Hahaha its been almost three weeks since i went to adventure cove with my friends! (: HAHA it was super fun i swear :') 

Derpy us ^ 

After swimming and derping around in the sun for hours ^ 

Adventure cove was interesting, although i felt that some rides were stupid and abit copied from Wild Wild Wet :/ the one with the rocket name (couldnt remember) was realy worth the time, although the queue was super freaking longgg, like if u go late, u can end up queueing for 1 hours plus :( lucky us, we were there at around 10am, and waited for about 20 minutes. The queue was long because the ride is like one person down the slide at a time, so we had to wait lorh. It was damn thrilling :D like a rollercoaster! And i realised i sort of overcame my fear of heights! (Is that a good thing???) but back to the story. A good tip about going there is you should always use those waterproof ziplocks to keep your phones so that u can snap pictures as u go along the rides, or even buy an under water lomo camera! Its worth it, but i didnt have it, so i didnt take much nice pictures of us :'( 

A another tip, its good to bring food to adventure cove and u can even keep it inside your locker as the lockers can be opened more than once. The food there is really expensive, we bought a pizza for $9, and its microwaved ._. The slushies there were about $5 as well. We must be smart ;) 

Our tickets, with me being the odd one out >:) 

I sort of like this picture, but my calves are really huge and muscular :((( 

Us on the way in the early morning ^  

After playing till about 4.30pm, we left the pool area, showered, and went for dinner at ViVoCity ;-) 

Beautiful sunset on 7th July 2013! 

I could eat soup spoon forever <3 

HAHA well, i dont really have much else to say le, so thats all for now :-) 

Haul of the day

Actually, i didnt go shopping. I just

randomly requested for a new bagpack and some socks. 

Le new bag.

Le purdy socks from Citrusox. 

Le sushi and milk tea lunch from cold storage and share tea. 

Am i still pretty after cutting off too much of my fringe? :') 

HAHAHA it was like an accident and i was like "SHIT FUCK WHAT DID I DO?!!!!" Ohwells. Hahaha it will grow back de uh. 

I have taken a liking to middle fingers and the f-word. Its like, not vulgar to me anymore. Ohmy. 

Holidays are ending T^T

Ugh so not fair, the holidays are ending T_T NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!! 

Even if i look at this i cant get any happier. AND ITS BECOS I HAVENT FINISHED ANY SCHOOL HOLIDAY HOMEWORK SHIT. Fuckkkk i rotted my entire holiday away FUCK. Omg total rage mode man. Hmm maybe i'll blog about cute-sy pictures hehehehe. 

I absolutely love love love minions!! :-*

I love kitties! 

ALL SO KEOPTA. 

HAHAHA ugh its like so stress lorh i see all the homework SIGHPIE X 1029192801927291091818. SO ANNOYING LUH. I REALLY DONT LIKE TO STUDY. I SILENTLY WISH I CAN EASILY GET A JOB WITHOUT ANY CERTIFICATES OR WHATSOEVER. OMGOMGOMG. Total rage mood on. I'm angry at myself for playing my entire holiday away, and i'm also damn pissed of with all the fucking homework the teachers threw at us. ALSJALAHSLAKSKSKDKLALASH. SIGHHHHHHHHHHH. Dayum school. 

But, i must be stronger. Okay hahahahaha. 

High-Class Dining Night :-)

HAHA today tuition was cancelled, so im free the entire afternoon! Went for dinner at Chatterbox in Madarin Meritus Hotel (idk how to spell it) and i had chicken rice for 27 bucks a plate mhmmmm. 

And gelato! 

Finally met with my cousin too :*

Hahaha wearing ma new skater dresssss. 

#step again, and with my mum's failed photography skills. (Fat thighs and calves) 

Wanted to say this to all my friends and family members and this one special person <3 HEY, THANKS FOR EXISTING :-) 

I swear today's the day where all my thoughts run wild and i have loads of crazy random thoughts HAHAHA. Really tired today although i didnt do much :/ meeehhhh.